In AWE

This afternoon, as I was swaying Zoe to sleep, I looked down at her sleeping face and I suddenly was overcome with so much emotion. A tidal wave of pure happiness just came over me and I couldn't believe that I was so deserving of this child. I couldn't believe God gave me such a BIG gift and that He deemed me worthy to be able to raise this child to her full potential. Seeing her breathe in and out and to be at such peace in my arms made me so very happy. Perhaps it was the hormones but I really just broke down and cried. I just kept saying "thank you Jesus. thank you. thank you. thank you" while tears streamed down my face. I was literally in awe of the baby in my arms. All of a sudden, all the anxiety and fears that plagued me (consciously and sub-consciously) the past nine months welled up and were immediately extinguished with each inhale and exhale of my child. What if I wasn't around to hold her and to smell the sweet scent of her breath? What a blessing to be able to carry her for nine months, go through a risky c-section and for the two of us to come out of everything 100% healthy?! Thank you Zoe for reminding mommy how WONDERFUL life really is and how much more we both have to look forward to!!!

I swear, I could look at this sweet face FOREVER ...